Day One.

My first day I decided I would blog about someone who is very close to me, and who I care about very deeply, you have heard a lot about her, so the challenge will moreso be to say what you haven't.

"I'm soo maad, I can't stand you Mom and dad."
That remark started one of the most amazing friendships I could ever ask for. August 16th, 2006. I was a confused, sad, thirteen year old who missed her friend in Guatamala. I was wanting one thing and one thing only, that one thing I did not receive, but I got a better gift, one I could of never expected. A friendship, one that has lasted over two years now. Jessica Reynolds, a 32 year old woman, who had encountered a lot in her life, and was going through losing her step daughter, responded to that sad bulletin. Asking me if there was anyway she could help, although I didn't take her up on her help then, shes been my saving grace for the past almost 26 months. Her simple request started a friendship that has been my life, and saved me from so much.

Jessica Reynolds

I care about her a lot, I care about her like a mom, and like a friend who is always understanding. She provides a motherly love and care, and understanding like no other friend I had ever had. She gets mad at me when I do wrong things, which has helped me a lot. If I drink, she knows, and she gets mad, which makes me feel bad, and stops me. Her friendship, is not just a friendship, it is a loving, safe, 'home' that I can always count on. We do not talk everyday, anymore, which truthfully is better for the both of us. But, I know. The second I need her, she is there.

I love her a lot, I don't know what I would do without her and her direction. I would be stuck in so many rutts if I didn't have her as a backup. I love this story, so I am going to tell it, because i'm sure its one that hasn't been heard.

I ran upstairs, and shut my door, as Jessica and Suzi and my Mom finished their supper. I sat on my computer, crying, and loathing in self pity. Suzi came and checked on me, knowing I left dinner pretty quick. "Are you okay, sweetie?" said Suzi in her kentucky accent. "Yeah I'm fine" as I wiped away the tears. She gave me a hug, knowing I wasn't fine, but I clearly did not want to talk about it. Jessica walked into my room, and asked what was wrong. I was bawling at this point "Nothing!". "If nothing is wrong then why are you crying?" .. I replied almost as in a grunt " I don't know .." and just kept on the computer as she sat down on my bed. She knew something was wrong and wasn't going to let me get away that easily. She presurred me a bit more " Something must be wrong, and saying I don't know isn't getting us anywhere". I finally exclaimed, " I guess.. you and Suzi know each other so well and talk about stuff and I feel left out ". A sudden feeling of not only relief but stupidity came over me. Jessica drove hours and hours to come see me, and I was acting like this. She said "We live in the same place, this is real life for us, and we didn't mean to not include you ". "I guess, this trip is just a lot different than the first one and I wasn't expecting it, I was expecting more me and you time". The more I spoke the more stupid I felt. I requested Jessica to bring Suzi and Caitlin, and I really wanted to meet them, why was I behaving like this, am I that pathetic? We went into my bathroom, she was going to dye my hair. I was still bawling, I don't know what was wrong with me. She passed me a klenex and said "Now its coming out of your nose" I started laughing, I think that was what I needed . Jessica requested me and her go out for lunch the next day, her last day. It took a lot of convincing but I did convince them, and I had an amazing time. Jessica took me out for lunch, and paid for my lunch. After driving like 10 hours to visit me, SHE was taking me out of lunch. Something wasn't right, but I guess thats Jessica for you.

I love you so much , Jess. Thank you, I wouldn't have it any other way. My first blog, my first day of 365.